SCENE VII. [The same. ]_ACT IV_THE ALCHEMIST_ELIZABETHAN DRAMA

SCENE VII. [The same. ]

[Re-enter] FACE with KASTRIL [to] SURLY and SUBTLE

Face. Why, now's the time, if ever you will quarrel

Well, as they say, and be a true-born child:

The doctor and your sister both are abdus'd.〖Cheated.〗

Kas. Where is he? Which is he? He is a slave,

Whate'er he is, and the son of a whore.—Are you

The man, sir, I would know?

Sur. I should be loth, sir,

To confess so much.

Kas. Then you lie i' your throat.

Sur. How!

Face. [To KASTRIL.] A very arrant rogue, sir, and a cheater,

Employ'd here by another conjurer

That does not love the doctor, and would cross him

If he knew how.

Sur. Sir, you are abus'd

Kas. You lie:

And 'tis no matter.

Face. Well said, sir! He is

The impudent'st rascal——

Sur. You are indeed. Will you hear me, sir?

Face. By no means: bid him be gone.

Kas. Begone, sir, quickly.

Sur. This is strange!—Lady, do you inform your brother.

Face. There is not such a foist〖Rascal.〗 in all the town.

The doctor had him presently; and finds yet

The Spanish count will come here.—Bear up, Subtle. [Aside.

Sub. Yes, sir, he must appear within this hour.

Face. And yet this rogue would come in a disguise,

By the temptation of another spirit,

To trouble our art, though he could not hurt it!

Kas. Ay,

I know—Away, [to his sister.] you talk like a foolish mauther.〖Girl.〗

Sur. Sir, all is truth she says.

Face. Do not believe him, sir.

He is the lying'st swabber! Come your ways, sir.

Sur. You are valiant out of company!

Kas. Yes, how then, sir?

[Enter DRUGGER with a piece of damask]

Face. Nay, here's an honest fellow too that knows him,

And all his tricks. Make good what I say, Abel,

This cheater would ha'cozen'd thee o' the widow.—

[Aside to DRUG.]

He owes this honest Drugger here seven pound,

He has had on him in twopenny's orths of tobacco.

Drug. Yes, sir. And he has damn'd himself three terms to pay me.

Face. And what does he owe for lotium?〖A lotion.〗

Drug. Thirty shillings, sir;

And for six syringes.

Sur. Hydra of villainy!

Face. Nay, sir, you must quarrel him out o' the house.

Kas. I will:

—Sir, if you get not out o' doors, you lie;

And you are a pimp.

Sur. Why, this is madness, sir,

Not valour in you; I must laugh at this.

Kas. It is my humour; you are a pimp and a trig.〖Dandy.〗

And an Amadis de Gaul, or a Don Quixote.

Drug. Or a knight o' the curious coxcomb, do you see?

[Enter ANANIAS]

Ana. Peace to the household!

Kas. I'll keep peace for no man.

Ana. Casting of dollars is concluded lawful.

Kas. Is he the constable?

Sub. Peace, Ananias.

Face. No. Sir.

Kas. Then you are an otter, and a shad, a whit,

A very tim.〖Kastril's terms of abuse are not meant to be appropriate.〗

Sur. You'll hear me, sir?

Kas. I will not.

Ana. What is the motive?

Sub. Zeal in the young gentleman,

Against his Spanish slops.

Ana. They are profane,

Lewd, superstitious, and idolatrous breeches.

Sur. New rascals!

Kas. Will you be gone, sir?

Ana. Avoid, Sathan!

Thou art not of the light! That ruff of pride

About thy neck, betrays thee; and is the same

With that which the unclean birds, in seventy-seven,〖The allusion here has not been explained.〗

Were seen to prank it with on divers coasts:

Thou look'st like antichrist, in that lewd hat.

Sur. I must give away.

Kas. Be gone, sir.

Sur. But I'll take

A course with you——

Ana. Depart, proud Spanish fiend!

Sur. Captain and doctor.

Ana. Child of perdition!

Kas. Hence, sir!—[Exit SURLY.]

Did I not quarrel bravely?

Face. Yes, indeed, sir.

Kas. Nay, an I give my mind to't, I shall do't.

Face. O, you must follow, sir, and threaten him tame:

He'll turn again else.

Kas. I'll re-turn him then. [Exit.]

Face. Drugger, this rogue prevented us, for thee:

We had determin'd that thou should'st ha' come

In a Spanish suit, and ha' carried her so; and he,

A brokerly slave, goes, puts it on himself.

Hast brought the damask?

Drug. Yes, sir.

Face. Thou must borrow

A Spanish suit. Hast thou no credit with the players?

Drug. Yes, sir; did you never see me play the Fool?

Face. I know not, Nab:—thou shalt, if I can help it.—

[Aside.]

Hieronimo's〖In Kyd's Spanish Tragedy.〗 old cloak, ruff, and hat will serve;

I'll tell thee more when thou bring'st 'em.

[Exit DRUGGER.] SUBTLE hath whisper'd with

ANAN. this while

Ana. Sir, I know.

The Spaniard hates the brethren, and hath spies

Upon their actions: and that this was one

I make no scruple.—But the holy synod

Have been in prayer and meditation for it;

And 'tis reveal'd no less to them than me,

That casting of money is most lawful.

Sub. True.

But here I cannot do it: if the house

Should chance to be suspected, all would out,

And we be lock'd up in the Tower for ever,

To make gold there for th' state, never come out;

And then are you defeated.

Ana. I will tell

This to the elders and the weaker brethren,

That the whole company of the separation

May join in humble prayer again.

Sub. And fasting.

Ana. Yea, for some fitter place. The peace of mind

Rest with these walls! [Exit.]

Sub. Thanks, courteous Ananias.

Face. What did he come for?

Sub. About casting dollars,

Presently out of hand. And so I told him,

A Spanish minister came here to spy,

Against the faithful——

Face. I conceive. Come, Subtle,

Thou art so down upon the least disaster!

How wouldst thou ha' done, if I had not help'd thee out?

Sub. I thank thee, Face, for the angry boy, i' faith.

Face. Who would ha' look'd〖Expected.〗 it should ha' been that rascal Surly?

He had dy'd his beard and all. Well, sir.

Here's damask come to make you a suit.

Sub. Where's Drugger?

Face. He is gone to borrow me a Spanish habit;

I'll be the count now.

Sub. But where's the widow?

Face. Within, with my lord's sister; Madam Dol

Is entertaining her.

Sub. By your favour, Face,

Now she is honest, I will stand again.

Face. You will not offer it?

Sub. Why?

Face. Stand to your word,

Or—here comes Dol, She knows——

Sub. You're tyrannous still.

[Enter DOL hastily]

Face.—Strict for my right.—How now, Dol! Hast told her,

The Spanish count will come?

Dol. Yes; but another is come,

You little looked for!

Face. Who's that?

Dol. Your master;

The master of the house.

Sub. How, Dol!

Face. She lies,

This is some trick. Come, leave your quiblins,〖Quibbles.〗 Dorothy.

Dol. Look out and see. [FACE goes to the window.]

Sub. Art thou in earnest?

Dol. 'Slight,

Forty o' the neighbours are about him, talking.

Face. 'Tis he, by this good day.

Dol. 'Twill prove ill day

For some on us.

Face. We are undone, and taken.

Dol. Lost, I'm afraid.

Sub. You said he would not come,

While there died one a week within the liberties.〖The district outside the walls subject to the city authorities.〗

Face. No: 'twas within the walls.

Sub. Was't so! cry you mercy.

I thought the liberties. What shall we do now, Face?

Face. Be silent: not a word, if he call or knock.

I'll into mine old shape again and meet him,

Of Jeremy, the butler, I' the meantime,

Do you two pack up all the goods and purchase〖Stolen goods, booty.〗

That we can carry i' the two trunks. I'll keep him

Off for today, if I cannot longer: and then

At night, I'll ship you both away to Ratcliff,

Where we will meet to-morrow, and there we'll share.

Let Mammon's brass and pewter keep the cellar;

We'll have another time for that. But, Dol,

Prithee go heat a little water quickly;

Subtle must shave me. All my captain's beard

Must off, to make me appear smooth Jeremy.

You'll do it?

Sub. Yes, I'll shave you as well as I can.

Face. And not cut my throat, but trim me?

Sub. You shall see, sir. [Exeunt.]

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